Authenticity begets Authenticity

Two of many middle school yearbook entries. Being ‘funcomfortable’ was an early love language.

“The world is changed by your example, not by your opinion.”

– Paulo Coelho, By the River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept (novel) (1994)

When I ask others to think of someone they know that they see as authentic, and describe the traits of that person, many of the answers are remarkably consistent:

• Comfortable in their own skin

• Always themselves

• Express themselves naturally

• Confident

• Unapologetic

• Say what they mean

• They’re just real

To be part of any organization, there is a culture and language that emerges that helps us conform to ways of working. This is life. You don’t get to wear your Superman outfit to work. We tend to be more ‘real’ with close work friends and peer levels, but we tend to suppress our natural expression to those in leadership above us and to those newer to the workforce.

This is why fostering authenticity is especially important as a leader.

Because when I’ve presented on authenticity to new joiners, they rightly question if I consider the privilege one has as a leader to speak your mind. Some wholeheartedly agree with me but remind me that over time “It’s easier for you to say this stuff.”

It’s true.

Sure, the higher you go as a leader, the more “freedom” you should have to be yourself. I agree and I’ve seen that play out across my entire career. Some leaders absolutely grow into that freedom. They relax. They become more human. They stop performing and start leading.

But the inverse is just as common.

As leaders rise, many actually become less authentic. The higher they go, the more compelled they feel to act like what they think a leader is supposed to be: more guarded, more scripted, more corporate.

Not because they want to, but because the stakes feel higher. Their visibility increases. So consequences feel heavier. And people get a little judgier up there. And slowly, I suspect unconsciously, some put on more layers of corporate armor that makes them less a connected to those on their team.

This is why the higher the role you have in an organization, the more you need to lean into helping people find their best selves at work. Foster this intentionally as a cultural norm that is celebrated.

Authenticity begets authenticity. Strong teams spring from people comfortable in their own skin. The more the merrier.